


Fear Is Made Of Water, Rising

by perkynurples



Category: Avatar: Legend of Korra
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Disability, Disabled Character, F/F, Major Character Injury, Wheelchairs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-12
Updated: 2017-11-12
Packaged: 2019-02-01 10:01:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12702561
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/perkynurples/pseuds/perkynurples
Summary: Korra is an accomplished swimmer, just about to start senior year of high school alongside her friends and girlfriend, at the top of her game, when her life takes an unexpected and drastic turn after an injury that renders her motionless, and seemingly cuts all her dreams and hopes short. Getting accustomed to an entirely new way of living will be a challenge, but thankfully she doesn't have to do it alone.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [milleniumrex](https://archiveofourown.org/users/milleniumrex/gifts).



She awakes, and the one sensation - the  _ only _ sensation - is light. Nothing but an all-encompassing white that confuses her at first, until her eyes focus enough so that the blurs begin forming into shapes, unfamiliar ones, but weirdly reassuring anyhow.

_ Hospital?,  _ her brain offers, dizzily, and she doesn’t have enough wherewithal about her to dispute it.

There is a strange numbness, something constricting her senses, like she's on the brink of remembering something, some sort of a sensation, but it is never truly realized. In fact, nothing really seems to cooperate, aside from her eyesight.

The idea of  _ person _ takes an age and a half to form in her head, but that's who that is, sitting next to her bed, slouched in an ugly armchair, clearly asleep.

Her next thought -  _ Asami. _

"Asami..."

Her voice sounds like she hasn't used it in years, but it does the job, Asami's eyes fluttering open, taking a moment to adjust as well, but then she sees, realizes, and leaps out of her chair - that, at least, elicits a recognizable reaction in Korra's body, the relief almost palpable.

"Korra! You're awake! How are you feeling?"

"Uhh... groggy? Hi," she mumbles, "what happened?"

"You're in the hospital," Asami says, not before planting a kiss on her cheek - another feeling she recognizes, the warmth, the softness.

"No, yeah, I, uh..." Korra means to continue, but has to clear her throat. "Actually, can I get some...?"

"Water?"

"Yeah."

"Here," Asami hurries to hold the cup to her mouth, sliding one hand behind Korra's head, helping her achieve an angle that doesn't leave it all dribbling down her chin. Why Korra is barely capable of supporting her own head, now, that's a whole another question.

"So, uh, what happened?" she repeats the question, and Asami takes a moment to sit on her bed, leaning in to tuck a stray strand of hair behind Korra's ear - something in her eyes offers a reason for worry, but Korra can't for the life of her figure out what it might be.

"You were in surgery for the better part of yesterday," Asami says, and it's obvious it's causing her some trouble, the pain in her voice palpable. "They didn't know how extensive the damage - well, they had to be careful."

"What happened to me?" Korra exhales - how many times is she going to have to ask the same question?

"Yeah, they... said it might take some time," Asami sighs, raking her hand through her hair, jaw tense, a frown creasing her brow - she buries her face in her hands, briefly, but it is enough for Korra to realize - yeah,  _ something _ is definitely wrong.

"Maybe I should call your parents first, I don't know if..."

"Asami," Korra says firmly, the horror in her own words only ever becoming apparent to her when she says them out loud: "I can't even move.  _ What _ happened to me?"

Asami only stares at her, large dark eyes glistening with what Korra only slowly realizes are the beginnings of tears.

"Right. Okay. I guess there's no good way to find out," she offers, her voice, usually calm and steady as a rock, wavering. "Do you remember what happened at the lake?"

Korra doesn't know what brings her to it, but almost as if drawn by some unnamed force, she looks down, where Asami sits so close to her, where she is gripping her hand with both of hers - her slender, pale fingers visibly closed over Korra's - and she realizes she can't feel it, not the warmth, not the softness of her skin, not even the faintest tingle.

And that's when Korra finally remembers.

-

"No, yeah, I think you're safe, Miss Billion GPA. Me, on the other hand, I might barely scrape by. Barely scrape by, you hear!"

"Oh, come on, Bolin," Asami laughs, leaning in closer for a more comfortable position against Korra, "you're going to do just fine. My offer to tutor you still stands."

"I value our friendship too highly," Bolin shakes his head, "twenty minutes in, you'd hate me."

"Our relationship barely survived me trying to teach him Maths, and we're brothers," Mako grumbles, flat on his back, shielding his face from the sun with his arm.

"We're lucky we have those fancy sports scholarships, then, eh," Korra reaches to punch Bolin in the arm, too preoccupied with her  _ own _ arm around Asami's shoulders to really commit to it.

"I'd be dead without it," Bolin whines, flumping down on the ground next to Mako, the two fussing over getting some room in between them for a more comfortable position, while Korra and Asami have the opposite problem, seemingly ever-incapable of getting close enough.

The new school year is fast approaching, but right now, there is not a single worry on their minds, aside from escaping the heat. Summer is refusing to give way to autumn yet, the sun scorching them as if it's in competition with itself, the shade of the old oak trees offering the only reprieve.

"I can feel my skin melting off," gripes Bolin, fanning himself with the very same textbook he should, for all intents and purposes, be reading.

"Same here," Asami sighs, momentarily extracting herself from Korra's embrace, much to her chagrin, to lean over her to snatch a bottle of lemonade from her bag, "maybe we really should have gone to the beach."

"You think?" Bolin whines.

"We've got a perfectly lovely body of water right here," Korra notes, "we could take a dip."

"Do you see anyone else swimming in it?" Mako remarks, "we could get in trouble."

"Aw, come on," Korra chuckles, "it's perfect  _ because _ there's no one else swimming in it! Look at that beautiful smooth water surface, man. There! There's a guy."

"Yeah, he's in a boat," Mako barely exerts enough energy to open one eye.

"Aw, come on, let's go for a swim!"

"I demolished that waffle like twenty minutes ago, remember?" Bolin says, "pretty sure you're supposed to wait, like... more than that, before you go into the water."

"That's actually true," Korra chuckles, "Asami?"

"I'm good," her beautiful girlfriend shakes her head, rearranging herself with the utmost care so that no even a single ray of sunshine reaches her alabaster skin, "you go on ahead. Tell me how the water is, eh? Maybe you'll convince me to follow you."

_ That _ wink is meant only for Korra to decipher, and she has to admit to herself, she isn't as good at that yet as she'd like to be. As far as... whatever people call  _ relationships _ these days, go, Korra and Asami have been dating for only a short while, but Korra is already convinced, down to her very core, that Asami is much more than a summer love - she looks at her sometimes, stunning, pristine, always so put together, and wonders how someone like that could ever go for someone like Korra herself. And then, too, she wonders why she never paid much attention in her Lit classes, because she might have picked up on some handy terms to describe how she actually feels about Asami, beyond the incomprehensible jumble of words that usually comes out when Korra tries to compliment her,  _ definitely _ beyond the emoji clusters she sends Asami all the time when they're not together.

Asami is the cream topping of her life, the safe harbor and the most thrilling adventure, and Korra would gush about her,  _ to her, _ endlessly, if only she knew how to avoid embarrassing herself.

She turns back to look at Asami over her shoulder as she nears the lake, having left her top behind, and about to shed her shorts, too - Asami is sitting upright, presumably taking picture after picture of her, and Korra blushes when she shoots her a thumbs up, _ go on, then. _

And so, praising her earlier wherewithal to wear her swim trunks just in case (mostly because she wanted to flaunt the new design to Asami, let's be honest), Korra waves at her, eyeballs the distance from the old wooden pier to the approximate landing zone, takes a few steps back, runs, and jumps.

-

There is nothing but the dull memory of a sound, like she's watching muted TV, registering the visuals, but incapable of making sense of them. Her mother is dead silent as well, gripping Korra's hand - not that she can tell - lips pressed into a thin, worried line - surprisingly, Dad is the one showing more emotion, eyes glistening with tears, his arms crossed so tight across his chest it's like he's physically holding himself in place.

Asami sits on the other side of the bed from Korra's Mom, lips soundlessly forming the ghosts of the words the doctor says - like she always does when she's concentrating, when she means to commit something to memory. She, too, is holding Korra's other hand, and Korra wonders if she should remind either of them - that it doesn't really matter. She can't feel it anyway. Maybe it's for them, more than it is for her. She wonders.

"Do you understand the implications?"

It takes her some time to figure out that the question is aimed at her - she has to stare at the doctor for a quite a while to make sense of it. Young, nice-looking, a very believable image of professional concern... What was his name again? ...Why is that important?

"Yeah, uh," Korra comments eloquently, "damaged... spine?"

"Specifically the C4 vertebrae, yes. The damage was severe enough to leave you like this - incapable of moving anything below your shoulders."

He's speaking slowly, slowly enough for Korra to realize that he's probably just repeating himself from earlier - she almost apologizes for not listening properly.

"Right," she sighs, "so, uh... What are the, um, exercises that I can do to get back in shape? Can I sign up for physical therapy?"

The glances exchanged across the room speak clearly - yet another portion of the conversation she clearly missed. For some reason, Korra is drawn to look at Asami, as if the mere sight of her will be enough to offer comfort, and some sort of reassurance - she does try, offering a smile that might be encouraging, if it weren't so pained.

"They can try," she says ever so softly - and isn't that the doctor's job? Korra speculates somewhat dizzily, "but the damage was so bad..."

"The likelihood of recovery at this point... It's minimal. You will most probably not be able to walk again."

"Yeah, but, like... I can work on that, right?" Korra squints, "look, I exercise  _ a lot, _ no physical therapy you throw my way will be too much, I can guarantee you that-"

"Korra," her Mom says softly.

"What, Mom? Look, just sign me up for the it, I promise I'll be a model patient, I'll work really hard. I'm really good at that, right?"

The smile Dad offers her borders on non-existent.

"I'll give you all some time," the Doctor offers, a bit incomprehensibly since, in Korra's opinion, they've only just started.

“Korra, honey,” her Mom says the second the doors close behind him, and Korra knows that tone. It’s the  _ now you listen to me  _ tone. The  _ I know something you don’t _ tone.

They all seem to be drawing closer to her, crowding her, and for the first time since she woke up, Korra really feels  _ the need _ to move, to curl up and get further away from them. 

“The doctors will do whatever is necessary to find a solution,” her Mom continues, quiet, dispassionate, “but...”

She looks to Korra’s Dad, expecting him to carry on, but it’s evident that he isn’t having any more of an easier time here.

“The damage was too severe,” Asami takes over, and in her dizziness, her incapability to pay attention right now, Korra admires how steadfast she can be, how assured she can sound. “It’s likely that you’ll never be able to... move your limbs again.”

Her immediate reaction is laughter, a dry huff that doesn’t convince even her, and she squints at Asami.

“Well, I mean... that’s not definitive, is it?” she speculates, “like I said, I can work on that... right?”

She looks down to where Asami is holding her hand still - it takes some effort because even her neck feels too stiff to turn her head around - and realizes that all this time, she hasn’t felt even the slightest tingle of a sensation.

“Right?” she repeats.


	2. Chapter 2

She runs, as fast as her legs will take her - the pool is like a shimmering gem ahead of her, and if she makes it into the water she will be safe, everything will be okay.

_ You can do this. You  _ know _ how to do this. _

The aquamarine tiles under her bare feet are slippery, but she pays them no mind. She just needs to make it into the water.

_ Just breathe in, take the plunge. _

She comes to a stop at the very edge of the pool, which now seems to stretch as far as the eye can see. She doesn’t remember it being this big... and she doesn’t remember ever hesitating.

_ Just jump, go ahead. _

The whirring of the lights coming alive above her startles her - one by one, an endless line of them, illuminating the water, and her, alone.

_ Just jump! _

 

"Korra? Korra."

"Huh?"

The woman is smiling - she's always smiling, despite everything - and Korra realizes she must have drifted off again.

"I said, do you want to try again?"

"Oh, uh... sure. I guess."

“Come on, then. Let’s sit you up.”

She closes her eyes before the woman’s hands reach her torso - if she keeps them shut tight, Korra can almost remember what that sort of touch feels like, almost feel the pressure and tug again. But no, when she opens her eyes again, she’s higher up than she was before, and the doctor is leaning over her to fluff up the pillows behind her back. Stupid, so stupid, that her body has to rely on  _ pillows _ to even be able to stay somewhat upright.

Her physiatrist is nice, at least - insists Korra call her by her first name, Pema - and there’s always a faint scent of coconut about her, which Korra has learned to concentrate on, since it’s about the only thing she gets to  _ feel _ right now.

“I’m going to work on your legs again today,” Pema announces, “would you like to watch TV?”

“It’s fine,” Korra shakes her head.   
“If you’re sure. Just pipe up if you change your mind.”

Some days, it’s impossible to watch a stranger’s hands all over her body, without being able to  _ feel  _ them, and so Korra resorts to glaring at this or that mind-numbing TV show while Pema works, but today, she thinks she can handle it. Maybe.

Maybe, if she closes her eyes for a change, she can concentrate on helping her body along.

She’s read all about it, being stuck here - people meditating so long and so thoroughly that they’ve managed to repair the destroyed pathways in their nervous system through sheer willpower alone. People forcing their bodies to cooperate, their limbs to reawaken. Miracles, except that there is no such thing - if Korra’s sports career has taught her anything, it’s that what other people might call a miracle, is nothing but the culmination of very hard work, and a lot of dedication. And she’s never shied away from either.

“So, who’s visiting today?” Pema keeps the conversation alive, experienced hands pressing smooth lines across the length of Korra’s calves. She does look away eventually.

“Asami,” she sighs, “after school.”

“Awesome! She’s really nice.”

“She is, yeah.”

She watches her own knee being lifted, closer towards her chest, ever so slowly, and then the other one... And so on, and so forth. Her muscles moving, but never announcing themselves. There used to be a pull, a residual burn here and there, after a good workout, and Korra would trade everything to experience that feeling again. Bettering her body was such a regular part of her life, stretch in the morning, exercise, stretch again, feel the muscles strengthen...

Except right now, she has to start from the beginning, all over again.

 

Pema leaves looking satisfied - but then she always looks satisfied, and it might not be particularly fair to her, with her soft face and big, kind eyes, but Korra can’t help but wonder how her expression changes the second the doors of the room close behind her.

_ Sleep is the best healing you can give your body, _ all the pamphlets and essays claim, but it eludes Korra throughout the rest of the morning, and after lunch, too, and by the time the expected knock on the door comes, around the time Korra has calculated, she’s almost managed to tire herself out with sheer boredom alone.

Asami steers inside with a big bag of... something, in her arms, and to Korra’s surprise, it’s not just her this time.

“Bolin! Mako!”

“He-ey!” Bolin’s grin is as wide as ever, while Mako offers a somewhat shier ‘Hey there’, but they both make their way to her bed more or less enthusiastically, while Asami merely shrugs with a satisfied smirk when Korra shoots her a  _ well this is a surprise _ look.

“I thought it might be nice,” Asami offers, while Bolin announces: “And we brought snacks! I mean, anything’s better than hospital food, right?”

“That’s true,” Korra rolls her eyes, “even the school cafeteria lunches would be a godsend, compared to this.”

“They must torture you here,” Bolin’s eyes widen, as he wriggles himself onto the edge of Korra’s bed - as cheerful and irreverent as ever, which is actually kind of relaxing.

“It’s okay,” she chuckles, “how are you guys?”

“Well, school’s in session now, obviously,” Bolin offers a truly pained grimace, “the suffering is real.”

She sees it in Asami’s eyes, the feebly masked horror - knowing her, she probably tutored the boys extensively on all the things they  _ shouldn’t say, _ before stepping in here, but honestly, with the amount of frustration she feels every day, Korra will eagerly take all the inappropriate remarks over people walking on eggshells around her.

“Yeah, man, I bet  _ your _ suffering must be awful,” she squints, and Bolin slaps his hands over his mouth.

“I’m sorry!” he moans through his palms, “I didn’t mean to-”

“You’re an idiot,” Mako sighs, smacking him upside the head playfully, then turns to Korra with his trademark serious concern: “How are you feeling, really?”

“Oh, you know,” Korra rolls her eyes, “I would vaguely point to the entirety of my stupid unresponsive body, if I were actually capable of that.”

“Right,” Mako chuckles, somewhat uncomfortably.

“Well, you might not be capable of flipping us off right now,” Asami takes over, “but how about some chocolate? Think you can handle that?”

“Just assume that the day I refuse chocolate, I’ve given up entirely,” Korra says firmly.

“Duly noted,” Asami smiles, and the contents of her mystery bag are finally unearthed.

 

The next thirty minutes are spent working their way through the assortment of candy and fruit her friends have brought - it might just be the sparse portions of her hospital meals, or the fact that her body no longer requires a whole lot to power itself, but Korra feels utterly full for the first time in ages. Bolin chats endlessly about this or that, his one true superpower in action, and Korra would almost be content to just lie there listening to him for the rest of the day, pretending like the uncomfortable questions will never come.

“So what did Pema say today?”

Asami means well, Korra knows she does, but it’s almost like being woken up too soon and too relentlessly - she just wants to dismiss her, roll over, and sleep through the rest of the day.

“Nothing,” she mumbles, “the usual.”

“Pema is...?” Mako inclines his head.

“The physiatrist,” Korra offers stiffly.

“A really nice one, too,” Asami adds, “what was that thing she said, about the muscles being kept alive even if the body can’t exercise them...?”

“Oh, yeah,” Korra sighs non-committally, “something like that.”

She senses Bolin and Mako watching her, curious, the kind of curiosity she can’t really deal with right now - there’s so much they don’t  _ know, _ so much she herself doesn’t know how to name, so much crap she doesn’t really want to talk about. Not now. Not yet.

“Doesn’t really matter,” she dismisses it, doing her best to sound casual, “Bo, send those grapes my way.”

“There you go. So, like, what? Does she think you’ll get better?”

“I don’t know,” Korra scowls, chomping down on the grape Asami feeds her a bit too hard.

“Is it permanent?” Mako chimes in.

“I don’t know.”

“Because I read that even if it looks totally hopeless, it’s been proven that the spinal cord has ways of, like...”

“Yeah, I read that too,” Korra interrupts him, “and, I don’t know.”

“The doctors say that the damage was pretty severe,” Asami explains gently, moving closer to Korra, perhaps without realizing it, “but there’s a lot of different techniques... like, rehabilitation techniques, that Korra wants to try, isn’t that right?”

Korra opens her mouth to respond, but something stops her - an emotion she doesn’t recall feeling before during these past days, and certainly not towards Asami.  _ You don’t have to talk about me like I’m a kid. Or a patient. Jesus. _ Anger, out of nowhere, of the scorching type.

“We’ll see,” she huffs.

“Well, hey, you never were a quitter,” Bolin offers cheerfully.

“Yeah, you can do anything, Korra,” Mako nods, and she tries,  _ really _ tries, to feel grateful, but all that she sees when she looks at them, are empty reassurances. Neither of them actually know what they’re talking about, and she couldn’t make them understand even if she tried. It occurs to her, quite out of the blue, that she has never felt more distant from the people she cares about the most.

 

_ Maybe it was too soon to bring them,  _ Asami texts her that evening,  _ I’m sorry. _

_ It’s fine, _ Korra types via the nurse who always comes by to help her with that,  _ it was nice. Sorry if I was a bit sour. Talk soon? _

If there is an answer, she doesn’t get to read it tonight, because however nice the nurse is, she has a lot of work to do, and even though Korra is everything but tired, the TV is shut off, as well as the lights, and after a call to Korra’s parents, the nurse puts her phone away into the night stand by her bed. As if Korra is six years old, and being ordered to go to bed early on a school night.

Right, remind yourself of yet another thing you’re not going to be able to do. Going to school seems like such a distant memory right now, like something she might have experienced years ago, but never again.

Sleep does find her at some point, but she never remembers how she managed it.

 

-

 

“My name is Lin Beifong, and I’ll be your occupational therapist. Do you know what that means?”

Korra glares. The woman is tall and stern, measuring her without a hint of kindness - more curiously, than anything. She doesn’t look  _ that _ old, but her hair is already a steely grey color, pulled away from her face, pronouncing the sharp angles of it even further, and Korra doesn’t know what to think about her at all.

"Not really," she averts her gaze, but still feels the stranger's on her. "You gonna tell me it's totally okay to be frustrated, and to keep my head up, because anything's possible?"

The stranger's eyes narrow - she reminds Korra of a particularly strict Maths teacher.

"I don't know, maybe. Is that what you want to hear?"

"Not really," Korra repeats, grumbling.

"Alright then. How about some cold hard facts, then. You think you can handle that?"

"I guess," Korra pouts. Who  _ is this _ lady?

"Great. Just like everyone else taking care of you, I saw the x-rays. I talked to your doctors. They all claim they haven't been keeping you  _ or  _ your family in the dark, but that isn't entirely true, is it?"

"Get to the point," Korra retorts, trying to ignore the sinking feeling in her stomach.

"Someone needs to say it out loud - I know you work very hard, but you're investing your energy in all the wrong places. You're never going to walk again."

In a way, Korra is almost relieved. She thinks. It's like a punch in the gut, of course it is, and her initial reaction is to get offended, be loud about her refusal, about her endless willingness to work on it, but then... Before her accident, she could have counted the number of times somebody carried her places on one hand. Right now, she couldn't even begin to guess the number of times a stranger touched her in order to help her with things, tasks, that used to be completely automatic to her.

Can't even wipe away her own stupid tears.

"Want me to help with that?" Lin offers, and it strikes Korra how sporadically she hears that - it's usually  _ can I do this, _ or  _ I'm going to do this. _

She nods, and Lin dabs a paper tissue to her cheeks - her stern outlook never changes, but there's still something comforting about the steadiness of her. The one person who neither overly coddles her, like the nurses, nor crumbles at the sight of her, like her family.

"Now then," Lin declares, "how would you like some fresh air? This room is stuffy as all hell."

"...What?" Korra exhales, her voice no louder than a sigh, "I can't exactly walk out of here."

"Yeah, well, you're not an infant," Lin Beifong supplies somewhat cryptically, "I'm pretty sure you can still support your own head."

"I don't... They offered me a wheelchair," Korra admits, "but I don't..."

"Kinda embarrassing, huh?" Lin scowls, "but here's another piece of news - you're not getting out of this room ever again, except in a wheelchair."

They glare at each other, and that, too, is kind of amazing - that Korra still gets to  _ glare _ at people, at least.

"So how about it?" Lin cocks her eyebrow.

It's only halfway through the hallway, strapped to what's probably a very comfortable wheelchair, that Korra realizes she might have waited for Asami to come visit later today, might have called her parents... It's still so hard, thinking ahead, because she's so used to doing the exact opposite of that, really. But there's no turning back now.

If she closes her eyes, with the lights slowly passing above her head, she can hear the quiet murmur of the water waiting for her, the anticipatory heartbeat of the crowd harmonizing with her own, three, two, one, take the plunge...

It's also never occurred to her just how much she misses water. Just water. The feeling of it enveloping her.

Her stupid sensibilities betray her again as Lin finally wheels her outside, and the crisp morning air hits her in full, her lungs almost bursting - it's been so long, and the second she tastes it, she hates herself for denying herself the sensation for so long.

"Nobody's staring at you," Lin reassures her, without Korra so much as voicing a single of those worries out loud, "everyone's going through their own stuff, trust me."

"Heartwarming," Korra utters, and Lin huffs a dry laugh.

She steers Korra to a quieter corner of the garden, with an overview of the park, adjusts Korra's blanket upon her request, her fingers around Korra's wrists as she gently lays her hands atop it... Korra realizes she hasn't seen her body in any other position than horizontal since the accident. In her head, she's turning her palms upward to look at them, then raising her arms above her head, high, higher, fingers interlocking, until her back cracks pleasantly and her lungs pump air more powerfully...

"It's not fair," she confesses quietly, saying the words out loud for the very first time.

"That's true."

Nothing but that - a confirmation of her words, plain and simple.

"You were a star athlete," Lin Beifong continues before Korra can bring herself to it, "you were used to exercising, and moving a lot every day, and now you feel trapped in a body that doesn't even feel like yours anymore, since you have no control over it. You're probably wondering what the point is anymore, right? That about hitting home?"

"Really?" Korra rolls her eyes, just about the only expression of dismay she's capable of anymore, "you read that in a textbook somewhere? You don't actually know me."

"That's true," Lin shrugs, "but I'd like to. Can you believe that?"

"I'm not exactly thrilling company these days," Korra scoffs.

"Mm, yeah. Well, whatever kind of person you think you are - you thought you were, before this happened - that's all gone. Your life will never be the same-"

"Seriously, are you reading this out of a book? Therapy for dummies?"

"- _ you _ will not be the same," Lin finishes the sentence without skipping a breath, and her eyes really do have the unique ability to glare beyond Korra's refusal and defiance. "Now, you can either mope about something you no longer have control over, or work with the things you  _ can _ control. Believe it or not, Korra, you're not completely useless."

"Gee, thanks. Can't even flip you off right now."

"A blessing, I'm sure," Lin replies dryly, "now, tell me - are you ready to give up before you even try?"

"According to your own words, there  _ is _ nothing to try - I can't reverse this. I can't get better."

"When did I ever say there was nothing to try?" Lin frowns, "reversing your condition is not an option, true, but all that energy you've been exerting on that empty chance, you can point towards something that will  _ actually _ help you. If you want. If you accept that there's no way back, only forward. Somewhat slower. In a wheelchair."

Korra huffs a laugh at that deadpan delivery, and she's sure Lin counts it as a small victory - but that's about the only thing she's sure of, really.

It's somewhere in the middle of September, school in full session, regular trainings have started... Her friends see each other every day, her Mom has probably made so much new pottery, her Dad finishing up with that newest building... And she lies here, day in day out, letting all of that pass her like... Well, yeah, like water.

"Fine," she sighs, heavily, like she can breathe freely for the first time since she woke up, "what do you think I can do?"


	3. Chapter 3

It's slow going. Really slow.  _ Blowing into a straw _ isn't exactly how she'd envisioned her recovery to go, but it does the job. The wheelchair is clunky, but Lin maintains Korra's lucky she was a swimmer, as she can control her breathing quite well. It isn't much solace to Korra, but she does it anyway - sip to stop, puff to go, breathe this way for left, that way for right... That, at least, she has control over. Somewhat, anyway.

"Look, I'm just saying! I gotta ask Dad about this. I'm sure he could figure something out. This is just... ugh. Clunky."

"If you say so," Korra smiles, and Asami scowls, as if she's silently scolding herself.

"Ugh, sorry. It does the job, I know. I just can't help but..."

"It's alright!" Korra shakes her head, "it might be cool. Could you tell him to make it a bit steampunk, maybe? Exhaust vents in the back, stuff like that?"

"I'll see what I can do," Asami laughs.

Her father's company specializes in high-end automobiles, and Korra doubts he'll be directing his engineers to design a fancy wheelchair instead of a car any time soon, but any idea that gets Asami excited is a good idea. Her girlfriend looks as radiant as ever today, even though Korra knows full well she's stressing herself out, to some degree - she should be home studying right now, or just resting, really, but whenever Korra brings it up, Asami is quick to shoot her down, dismiss it as nonsense. She claims that the best rest she gets is by Korra's side anyway, and even though Korra is sometimes still disinclined to see herself as anything but a burden, there's no denying that Asami's company always improves her spirits immeasurably.

A loud, curt knock on the door announces the arrival of Lin, and Asami plants a quick kiss on Korra's cheek, perking up, as if she's particularly looking forward to the doctor's arrival.

"Afternoon, ladies," Lin greets them, "how's the training today?"

"Didn't bump into any walls," Korra announces, "how much longer do I have today?"

It's been two weeks of the wheelchair on loan from the hospital, but at the end of the day, Korra still has to give it away, have Dad pick her up, and go back to lying useless in bed - and it's amazing how quickly one becomes accustomed to being able to move again, at the very least. Korra's parents are not exactly millionaires, either, but since getting her own wheelchair is kind of inevitable - Dad can't really spend his best years carrying her around, no matter how often and how vigorously he reminds her that he'd carry her to the ends of the world - there's been a lot of talk about how to make that happen. But for now, Korra has to work with what she's got.

"Oh, a little while longer," Lin smiles, and it occurs to Korra - she actually  _ smiles _ . And what's more, Asami and her seem to be in on something together, or at least it seems that way. They exchange a look, nothing but a glance, but it's enough to make Korra squint suspiciously.

"How about a stroll outside, before your Dad comes pick you up?" Lin suggests, to an enthusiastic agreement from Asami.

"Sure, but... what's going on, guys?"

"It's a lovely day!" Asami grins, at the same time that Lin declares: "I'm sure I have no idea what you're talking about."

Suspicion or not, they do make their way outside, Korra concentrating on operating her wheelchair correctly, while Lin and Asami are engaged in a lively conversation about the wonders of Asami finally receiving texts from Korra again, thanks to the mouth-held stylus her phone now comes equipped with... The two have struck up quite the rapport over these past weeks, even though initially, Asami was the one to support Korra whenever she complained about Lin being too strict, or just too damn pedantic and needlessly stubborn. 'Remind you of someone?' Asami laughed enough times that Korra herself had to admit what she'd been contemplating for some time anyway - that she's damn lucky to have gotten Lin, who drives her hard and doesn't forgive a single misstep, as a therapist, instead of someone who might coddle her instead of making her challenge herself.

"What the- Mom? Dad? What are you guys doing here?"

Of course, the sight of her parents seemingly waiting for them side by side, is quite effective at taking her mind off all that.

"Hi there, sunshine," her Dad smiles, while her Mom hurries to greet her with a hug, proclaiming: "Well, it is a lovely day, isn't it!"

"I've heard that one before, yeah," Korra squints, "what's going on? Everybody looks really... chipper."

"Well..." her Mom grins, while her Dad adds quickly: "We've got a bit of a surprise for you, actually."

"Oh?"

"You've been doing really well with everything I've thrown at you so far," Lin, of all people, continues.

"Yeah? Am I getting a medal?"

"Something a bit better," Lin actually  _ winks _ at her, "oh. There they are."

Korra doesn't know who she's supposed to be looking at, at first. That old lady reading peacefully on that bench? The two gentlemen chatting while progressing at the speed of about a meter an hour with the help of their canes? That guy with a dog...? Oh.

It's a big dog,  _ huge _ , in fact, and snow white, and it takes Korra some time to realize that they're actually heading... towards her?

"Hi there," the dog's handler greets them, "you must be Korra."

"Uh... I mean, yeah."

"Nice to meet you! I'm Tahno, and this is Naga."

"...Hi? Lin?"

"You do remember us discussing a mobility assistance dog, right?"

Korra stares. The dog stares back, now sat obediently at her handler's side, panting happily.

"You mean...?"

"She's yours, honey," her Mom can't contain her glee, "if you want her, that is!"

"Go say hi, Naga!" Tahno commands, and the dog transforms immediately, from calm and collected, to really excited, bouncing over to Korra, sniffing the wheelchair, before moving onto Korra's hand, licking it eagerly, seemingly checking over every inch of Korra's arm, before Asami moves in to pet her, something that Korra herself can't do, no matter how much she'd like to.

"Hi, girl," Korra chuckles.

"She's beautiful," Asami sighs.

"She is, I'm... Is this for real?"

"It's for real, sweetheart," her Dad crouches down next to her, "what do you think? Lin says a service dog could be a great deal of help."

It isn't that often that Korra is rendered speechless, but the combination of all the smiles around her, the dog acting like she's the best thing in the world, her own  _ actual _ happiness... It's a bit too much.

"I'm, uhh... yeah. Yeah, I mean, if..."

"It's gonna be a bit more work," Lin is always there to remind her of reality, exactly in the way that Korra needs. "For you, and for your parents, too."

"You folks have never had a dog?" the handler asks.

"Not really," Korra's Mom giggles, already making good friends with this one, though, simply by providing enough scratches.

"Well, Naga is a bit of a handful, but she's very well behaved. All she wants to do is help."

"Asami," Korra exhales.

"Yeah?"

"Help me, I wanna pet her."

Even though she can't really feel it, Korra, guided by Asami's elegant fingers gently wrapped around her wrists, buries her hand in that long luscious fur, and Naga simply sits and looks on, panting softly, bright eyes only on Korra, no one else, in that moment.

"Hi girl," Korra repeats, "hi Naga."

And so, in the least expected turn of events after the turmoil that was her accident, Korra suddenly has a dog.

 

-

 

When she was seven years old, she was too afraid to go for the headlong dive. She remembers staring intently at her own toes at the very edge of the diving board, wrinkly skin and all, seemingly frozen in time, incapable of taking the leap despite the gentle but persistent encouragement from her coach. It had seemed impossible, dangerous even - she was afraid, she thinks, that if she were to jump wrong, she’d hit her head on the bottom of the pool, pass out, and never come back up again. Irrational, silly, and yet... Her lungs had burned with the exertion, her heart pounding all the way up in her throat, making her nauseous.

_ Just jump, Korra, go on, it doesn’t have to be perfect. _

She feels the same nausea right now, looking up at the building of her school, people pouring in and out, she can see them moving inside, so effortless, so quick...

“You ready?”

Asami is bundled up to her ears in winter clothes, cheeks red and eyes gleaming, and Korra summons a somewhat wobbly smile.

“I don’t think I ever will be,” she confesses, and Asami only laughs.

“Yeah. Remember, we can leave whenever.”

“Yeah, I... I know. I guess. Let’s go.”

 

It’s been a busy couple of months - way back at the beginning, she didn’t think she’d ever know  _ hard work _ again. There was, indeed, a time when she was convinced that her accident had been the end of her productivity, her happiness, her abilities - and really, admitting that she had had those thoughts in the first place, was in fact the very first step in accepting her new reality.

Her parents had to rebuild the house almost in its entirety - wider door frames, wider...  _ everything _ , come to think of it, for her wheelchair to maneuver through; less things for Naga to knock over, moving their bedroom upstairs while Korra found a new room on the ground floor... Installing the impressive ramp to the second floor just in case she wanted to go there anyway. Looking back, they did such an impressive job of... of making her feel welcome, making her feel like she still belonged in her own home, in spite of her initial doubt.

_ Wouldn’t just up and moving be easier?, _ she would ask them at times, and they’d always dismiss her, apparently happy for the challenge.  _ This old place needs some sprucing up, anyway. _ Dad made it a project of his, drafting entire blueprints for how to make the entire house more Korra-friendly.

For her, it meant re-learning how to fight - how to see everything not as an obstacle hindering her process, but rather as a stepping stone. Naga, who now trots by her side, happy as ever, has been absolutely instrumental in making that happen, making Korra feel like herself again, reminding her of the meanings of words like  _ joy, _ and  _ laughter, _ and  _ luck. _

All in all, yes - Korra  _ was _ unlucky, for one life changing second last summer, but she has been nothing but fortunate ever since, fortunate to be surrounded by people willing and able to help and support her, fortunate for one big fluffy soul entirely devoted to her... Fortunate to still be here, really.

Completely lost in thought, the first thing to jolt her out of it is the clatter of the shiny metal ramp installed by the staircase leading to the school entrance.

“Whoa, slow down there, speed racer!” Asami laughs, and it is only then that Korra realizes how easily it comes to her now, operating her wheelchair, breathing along with it, so that it moves exactly as she wants.

They do get a handful of curious stares from some younger kids she doesn’t recognize, but all in all... she’s back inside the school. And that’s that - simple.

“It’s okay,” she says, “go where you need to go, I’ll be fine.”

“Well, it only so happens we’re headed the same way,” Asami smiles, “I thought I’d at least walk you to your classroom.”

The elevator has always been there, officially only to be used by disabled students and sometimes faculty or the janitor, but the truth is, back in the day, everybody and their mother rode it just for the hell of it, ten, twelve people stuffing in just to prove a point... Korra feels strange, to say the least, using it for the first time because she actually  _ needs to, _ and other people notice, too, granting her some more curious glances.

Naga trots inside eagerly, scouting the perimeter, so to speak, and when she’s satisfied, she sits down next to Korra’s wheelchair, patrolling calmly.

“I’ll check in on you after second period,” Asami goes over their plan for the day as the elevator leaves them on the third floor of the building. “You’ll see if you’re going to want to stay for more.”   
“I know, I know,” Korra smiles - the corridor is blissfully deserted, save for a few people hurrying here and there, but her heart is still speeding up, the closer they get to her classroom.  _ Just breathe in deep, Korra, take the plunge... _

“Just checking,” Asami giggles, “okay, you ready to go in?”

She does hesitate, after all - it would be so much easier to just turn around and go home. Study from home, even. Nobody is forcing her to do this, quite the opposite, in fact. The school was perfectly happy to devise an individual learning schedule for her, and they’d probably stick by it... But no. She always knew this wasn’t going to be easy, and there’s no backing out now. From any of this.

“Yup,” she says, satisfied with the conviction in her own voice, “let’s do this.”

 

She is greeted by noise - just,  _ a lot  _ of noise. The classroom is  _ packed _ with people, there’s Bolin and Mako, her classmates, of course, some teachers, her old swimming team along with the coach... They’re all there  _ for her, _ cheering and clapping, and the whiteboard reads ‘ _ WELCOME BACK KORRA! _ ’ in red marker... Naga starts barking in surprise, which prompts some laughter, and Korra goes about calming her down, her own words a bit jumbled.

“Everyone... oh my god. I’m, uh... hi!”

_ Hi Korra! It’s so good to see you! Oh my god, the dog is adorable! Welcome back! Welcome back... _

“Welcome back,” Asami murmurs, closest to her, leaning down, half shielding her from the onslaught of people, all seemingly just thrilled to see her - and really, is that so difficult to believe?

“Did you...?” Korra barely manages those two words, let alone a coherent sentence.

“Yeah, it was an idea I bounced around with Mako and Bolin, and a few others. What do you think?”

“Please say you’re okay with it,” Bolin appears almost theatrically nervous, “or I’m getting  _ a lot _ of people into trouble by being late for first period...”

“I’m - of course I’m okay with it!” Korra laughs, “thank you! And, uh... thank you, everyone, for being here. It’s, um, well... Kinda strange to be back, to be honest with you, but this is so nice. Thank you.”

Scattered laughter, and people asking a whole lot of questions over one another, but somehow, Korra only has eyes for Asami, who appears incredibly pleased with herself, and rightfully so.

“Thank you for doing this,” Korra tells her quietly, and Asami only nods, smiling bright.

“It’s good to have you back.”

There would have been a time when Korra wouldn’t waste any time pulling her in for a kiss, but as she is right now, she can only grin at her, and hope that she knows - knows just how much this means to Korra, just how lost she would be without Asami by her side.

Right then - it’s going to be alright. Might very well be the first thing she’s been certain about since the accident, but she  _ knows _ , right there and then - she can do this.

_ Just breathe in, take the plunge. See? You’re doing great, Korra, and you’re going to get so much better, just you wait. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A fic for the very patient [wombatking](http://wombatking.tumblr.com). This was my very first time writing about this topic, and hopefully I did it justice! Let me know what you guys think, and you can always come catch me at [my Tumblr](http://bilboo.tumblr.com)!


End file.
